1st day of holiday starts today.
the date, day i realised & understand everything.
i get it now;
i hate the feeling of being SICK!!
{getwellsoon, amanda}
today wasn't a good day for me. last nite fell asleep at mei's bed & she actually have to sleep on my bed. sorry mei & thankie for helping me covering me with my blankie. woke up reallyreally late today, ard 2plus pm. shocking huh!! guess bcos i was really tired & feeling freaking unwell. && its been days.
i actually spend my day today sleep, eat, rest, & back to sleep. guess due to bcos of my sickness. bad flu & sore throat is killing me. headed for dinner with family at PP. foodcourt for dinner, && its always packed with ppls. went shopshop, checked out lappy pricing. {guess i dun noe i shld buy lappy, everyone seems so unhappy when i buy lappy} {sighh. i dun noe wat went wrong that actually everyone seems unhappy with me. i seriously dun noe, wat have i done wrong.} half-way through, went home alone. catched BOF last 1hr.
**as i say in my previous post, i will update some pictures, i will update soon alrite. sorry for the long waiting.**
sighhh. today, i finally realised & understand everything. the ways you guys treated is like totally shyt, like im nobody to your, im no-one to your, && im no longer important to your. i guess im really not suppose/meant to be in this family && i guess im also not suppose to exist in this family too. when your need me, your treat me totally good, dun need me treat me like total shyt. im seriously tiredd. i seriously hope for those days back but well things do changes. i felt like im a total idiot. somehow i feel like running away from this family. running away from you guys. running away from all this family probs. im breaking down soon. everytime i face this kind of probs, i tears in my loneiness, hide in a place & cry alone, do you guys noe, do you guys noe how i feel?? NO rite. sometime i feel, i start to hate & dislike tis family, sometime i also feel im not your real child. im tired, seriously tired. someone, plspls take my farfar away, away from all this probs.